Crossword Challenge 2012.

This year’s Crossword Challenge occurred on Saturday, the fourth of August and had five contestants: Andrew, Ashleigh, Joshua, Emily and Bonnie. Lutes, Lutes, Lutes, Robertson and Lutes, respectively.

Bonnie Wonnie was the most reluctant to participate and spent most of the week preceding the Challenge insisting that she wouldn’t participate because it made her too nervous and she wasn’t any good at crosswords and it was too windy/dark/cold and anyhow she didn’t have a pen handy so it would simply be impossible.

She changed her tune when she found out that the crossword was from the Monday closest to her birthday. “Mondays are easy,” she definitely said. “And being so close to my birfday can’t hoit either,” she probably thought.

Everyone grabbed a lantern and a pen and a copy of the puzzle and we began with Mallory as timekeeper. Mallory definitely almost cheated (SCANDAL) by telling me an answer but I shushed her and fortunately ignored her because it turned out her answer was Incorrect. She probably got overexcited and didn’t REALLY mean to almost cheat. Given that she fed me a bum answer maybe she was playing for somebody else.

The following message is just for Mallory: MALJAN IF YOU REALLY FED ME A BUM ANSWER ON PURPOSE THEN YOU GOT SOME SPLAININ TO DO.

Mother finished first, of course, and after she handily spanked everybody she changed her tune again to a new and entirely more GLOATY melody. “You really aren’t done yet?” and “Well, at least you guys don’t suck as much as you did last year” are two real life quotes from Trash Talking Mammy.

I finished second with Andrew close behind. He has been doing a lot of crosswords on his phone as practice and had a perfect grid (mom made one mistake and I made two). Ashleigh finished fourth and Emily came in fifth. Of course the rankings don’t REALLY matter and it is all about the spirit of unity that the game brings. Who wants to be a know-it-all smarty pants and get first place, anyway?

Folks, Crossword Challenge 2013 is just around the corner and you can never start practicing too late! If you want daily crosswords to practice on let me know and I will direct you to a website I made that can get you any New York Times crossword since like 1991 or so. Then we can all work together real hard and finally BRING DOWN MOTHER ONCE AND FOR ALL.